William

I've been a bachelor for the last two centuries. I enjoy the bachelor lifestyle but could really use a more constant companion who can put up with my work schedule. My research demands I spend a lot of time human side, but if you can deal with that you'll find when I am home I'm all the companion you need to keep you busy.

Interests: My work has left me very little time to develop any side interests other than sex. However, I have spent quite a bit of time attempting to genetically engineer vultures with an additional head flap that would help to keep them cool in the desert.

Favourite pastime: When I do get back to Hell, I really enjoy a long soak and massage at The Sulphur Spa. Yolanda is the best and if you tip her enough she'll give you her extra special massage...

Pet peeve: Human hands. They're so small!

Quote: "If you haven't found the answer, you probably haven't mucked around in the shit enough."

I think I've got it!

I know I've said this before, but I really do think I've got it. Initial tests are all positive. Now all we have to do is track the on-going results. A full life span is scheduled for analysis, so I have more time on my hands than I usually do after reporting back.

It's kind of not satisfying; like what I hear other males say premature ejaculation is like. I got my Demon of the Month award a month before I hit on the latest mixture. When I reported back with my very satisfying results I barely got a 'well-done' before I was ushered out the door. I know things are in a bit of an uproar, but come on, did you read the latest news? Who do you think is responsible? Me, that's who.

Dr. Khala

Remember your 6 month check-up!

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